When a marriage breaks down and one partner gets custody of the children, it leads to a lot of heartburn for the other parent. He/she (in most cases, it’s the father), gets relegated to weekend-visits at best. Such parents become the forgotten victims of divorce, who end up struggling to stay part of their children’s lives.
Anxiety
The biggest cause for worry among the parent who loses the custody battle is how to continue playing an important part in their child’s life. When you don’t see your kids every day, it can be tough to maintain a strong connection. But not living under the same roof doesn’t have to mean being less involved — there are lots of things you can do to be an active mom or dad.
Be civil with your ex
As a separated parent, you just have to adopt a different mindset. Your marriage might have been a disaster and you might have had an acrimonious divorce. But whatever you feel about the mother or father of your children, having an amicable parenting relationship goes a long way to help you stay part of their lives. And even if there are resentments, never air them in front of the child.
Get involved in the day-to-day
Be involved in the normal everyday stuff. Talk to the kids about their friends and interests, go to parent/teacher events and regularly ask the school for details of your kids’ progress. Make sure you keep yourself in the loop about the happenings in your child’s life. Try and keep things as normal as possible, just like they were before you got divorced.
Timetable some ‘unspecial’ time
Treating your kids is great, but being a parent isn’t just about fun times. It’s just as important to sit down to eat together or watch TV — and to be there when discipline is needed.
Show you’re still a family
Regardless of how the relationship ended, you’re still a family. It’s important that children see both of you in parenting roles. Have common goals for your child. Most importantly, let the child know that your idea of bringing him/her up matches that of your ex-spouse.
http://www.mumbaimirror.com/article/9/201007062010070602030784273ae74a4/Parttime-parenting-tips.html
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Kumar this pain no one in the world should get. My brother in law goes through this pain so i am evidence of it. The hope for that day to see kid and time just runs away. That lady gives somereason or other to see that my brother in law doesnot meet kid fever,exams etc. Even few hours she sees goes away. I dont know why ladies do like this. I showed this blog to ramana, he feels he should keep his zeal. timetable for unspecial time too good a word. I want to thank from deep of heart for it has given ramana a new zeal. May god give you big life kumar. Tears went of my eyes without knowledge when ramana said he should be blessed with long life. No more words kumar i am moved thats it.
ReplyDeleteNice article with things doable. Good job friend it should help lot of people.
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