Since our earliest days Philosophers have often queried and theorised on what it takes to be happy. Wars have been fought, lives lost and much sufferring caused in the quest for happiness. Over the past few decades there has sprung up a whole industry focused on helping to be happier ranging from travelling across the world to visit some mystic to aromatherapy. It’s become a fashionable trend in Psychology, where Psychologists avidly study whether being nice to your neighbour will make you happier than coveting his wife… or car.
Yet despite all this attention and the rainforests full of tips from self help Guru’s that are published every year, as a society, according to Psychologist’s, we’re failing in our happiness project. And so people get led into thinking that there must be some great truth or formula that they have to understand to unlock the holy grail of happiness.
The Real Truth About Happiness
The real truth is that we are so stuck in our social and mental patterns of behaviour that we’ve actually got it so back to front that we can’t see what we need to be happy. It’s not that we need to learn how to be happy, we just have to learn to stop doing the things that make us unhappy.
Look at any young child or pet. Unless they are, or have been, in some unnatural situation that is causing them to be unhappy they will naturally be playful, curious, interested to learn and… happy. It’s only when they start to get to get closer to the teenage years of learning the rules and behaviour that fit in to the world that they start to lose that natural zest and love of life.
It’s the losing of themselves in trying to conform that causes them to become unhappy. And so to fix that basic error we go searching for some other code of conduct that we think can make us happy.
It’s not that you are missing or lacking anything… only that you are suppressing what would make you truly happy…
Yourself. Your true self.
Your natural spontaneity. Your natural and uninhibited sense of fun.
The Two Keys To Happiness
There are only two things that we need to be happy and love our life.
One is to live passionately. To have someone or sonme thing that we love and care about. To have a dream that excites you to strive and grow towards.
The other is to deal effectively with fear. If passionate living is the accelerator on our journey, fear is the brake. All evil ever committed at it’s root is caused by fear. Consider this. Every country has a Department of Defence. Yet none have a Department of Attack. Yet if none are attacking, how come we keep having wars?
It’s fear that causes us to attack in all it’s forms. From World Wars to personal conflict. Yet we don’t typically think of ourselves being afraid. Instead we recognise fear more commonly as stress. And so it is stress that causes much unhappiness. This can be the stress of fitting into ‘the rules’ or trying to do more that we can fit into our day or caring too much about what other people think. Whatever the form it takes, it’s stress and fear that hold us back from a happier life.
Which leads us to the big question. What is happiness?
It’s as simple as the pure and unadulterated love of life. As it is, without needing to change it, flavour it or sweeten it. And to reach such a state of mind requires authenticity. In short, happiness is about one simple thing.
Allowing the natural DNA that is you to express itself, without any self consciouness, in whatever environment or context you find yourself in. In simpler terms, forget about ‘what you should do ‘ and do what comes naturally.
Unfortunately though, while this concept should be simple, it is so different from our cultural training that we misunderstand it.
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