Today 25th june of 2009, I had ultimately decided to accept the lost dream. I was a warrior to the core fighting with the fate and questioning it always. I had a dream, a dream of having kid and having time with kid. Holding the kid's hand and help him walk. Take him on shoulder and lap him so that he sleeps. Teach him A,B,C,D etc. Teach him numbers. Run before the three tyre cycle. Buy clothes to him every month. Buy sound making and lighting shoes for him. comb him properly though i rarely comb. Eat papad sharing with him. snacks with him. sleep with him on the chest. take him to temple and put tilak on him. to dress him as little Krishna. Bring joys in home. I dont know how many thoughts i have like this if i keep on putting on paper.d watch tv with him and dance. Go to parks to play the ball with him. countless dreams.
But today all of them have come to an end. I have accepted that I cannot make it come true. I tried sincere every time but result was always against me. I have come to a stage from where making a come back is no more possible. In a over one can try to hit 36 runs. but when target crosses more than 72 no bowler will bowl so many no balls to make it happen. So I have decided to bury this dream. Its a loss which i cannot repair by any way. First time I felt of having no more road ahead. So this dream is closed once for all.
I dont have words to type anymore.
I wish lord vishnu bless my friends and others that this day should never come in anybodies life.
Regards
PSN Kumar
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